I feel a lot of pressure and obligation to maintain this blog, finish my books, go back to school or find a second career, in the meantime, having to deal with disappointments, unreliable work partners, cruel spectators, my parents, and the fact that everyone around me is either getting married or breaking up.
For a while it was pretty easy for me to shut down. They say true equanimity is about balance and acceptance in any situation. If you go too far, like I did, you start to feel indifferent. So I withdrew, I didn't care, and I numbed myself to the need to act and do something about my life.
This blog is an extension of the type of person I am, who I want to be, and what I want other people to see. And for the last six months, I admit, I wasn't so sure about a lot of those things.
But I feel much better now.
For a while it was pretty easy for me to shut down. They say true equanimity is about balance and acceptance in any situation. If you go too far, like I did, you start to feel indifferent. So I withdrew, I didn't care, and I numbed myself to the need to act and do something about my life.
This blog is an extension of the type of person I am, who I want to be, and what I want other people to see. And for the last six months, I admit, I wasn't so sure about a lot of those things.
But I feel much better now.
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